Treatment Pitch Feedback

What worked well? (e.g effective application of genre conventions)
I believe that our pitch generally went well. As a group, we constructed a structured script which outlined all of the worries and questions that we thought people might ask. We talked about who had what role in the group, the target audience, why the opening scene fits the genre, some of the conventions that we challenged, the music that the opening scene included, the research we had carried out and we described our opening sequence. Myself and Becky were rather nervous and we read off the sheet, but Connor did really well by giving the audience eye contact and talking to them confidently.

What would make your initial idea even better? (e.g more reference and use of genre conventions)
To make our initial idea even better we are going to use Mr Lawes feedback on changing the characters so that they are totally different with different personalities etc. An example of this is to use one of the girls working in a primary school being very creative and then the other girl being a lawyer being very smart and sophisticated. We believed at a group this would be a good idea and we have planned to take a trip back to our old primary school to see if we can gain permission to film part of our filming their.

What will you do next?
We are going to have to re-think our idea and understand and discuss what we need to change and how we can change it to make it look better. We are also going to have to write the dialogue for the conversation, finalize where we are going to film, construct a shot list and draw up a storyboard. Another thing we will have to do is think about what actors we may want to use in our film.